This morning I was in the shower, praying about what topic I should write on today. But I was coming up blank – zero inspiring ideas. Finishing my shower, I pulled on some comfy fleece leggings and my favorite tshirt, snuggled cross-legged into my glider chair (yes, I’m such a grandma), and opened my Bible to where I’m reading in Psalms.
How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day?
How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?
It starts off a bit depressing, doesn’t it? But I could identify with the writers’ feelings.
I certainly wasn’t drowning in depression this morning, or feeling overtaken by the enemy. It was just a normal morning. But often, in the midst of normal, there can be a sorrow hidden deep in the heart, and these silent questions underlying our days – how long, O Lord?
You know what I mean, don’t you?
It’s the single woman, longing for the husband she’s been praying for.
It’s the woman who feels lonely without true friendship in her life.
It’s the one stuck in a complicated situation and wishing for simplicity.
It’s the wife who feels isolated from her husband.
It’s the woman who can’t have children.
It’s the mom whose children are far from the Lord.
It’s the one dealing with a long-term illness.
There are so many possibilities, so many circumstances that could be the source of our sorrow and our questions. You have yours, and I have mine. Sure, we aren’t continuously depressed, but if we get quiet and look deep, the “how longs” are there.
But I love how Psalm 13 ends:
But I have trusted in your steadfast love;
My heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord,
because he has dealt bountifully with me.
I have trusted in God’s faithfulness, and I will continue to trust.
I will rejoice. No matter what. I will rejoice when He comes through for me and answers my prayers, but I will rejoice until then, too.
He has been good to me. Already – even with unmet desires and unanswered questions – He has already blessed me so much.
So I keep singing, praising, and trusting… because no matter where I am, He is good!